My situationship dumped me over text on my birthday. A trip to Serbia healed me.

• An breakup text on my birthday was a shock I didn’t see coming.
• It came while I was on a trip with my dad and brother, making stops in Serbia, Bosnia, and Croatia.
• Instead of meeting up with my now-ex at the end of the journey, I was able to extend the family trip.

Perhaps the worst birthday present in the world? A text from your situationship breaking things off.

I had just landed in Serbia with my dad, brother, and uncle. We were about to take a two-week trip to visit family and explore a few countries. Our plan was to start in Serbia where my dad was born, then move through Bosnia and Croatia with a final layover in London. There, I’d meet up with my label-less friend during my 24-hour layover. It was the perfect plan until I opened WhatsApp the morning of my birthday to a message saying it wasn’t perfect after all.

I was initially devastated. My family had no clue what happened — I wasn’t ready to explain my grief just yet — but my dad, brother, aunt, and cousin treated me to a tour of Belgrade, a traditional lunch, and a delicious glass of wine. At the end of the day, I resolved to make the best of the next two weeks. I refused to let anyone ruin my adventure, especially one as special as this. Little did I know that with some quick thinking and a bit of recklessness, the next two weeks of adventures would heal me in ways I never expected.

Reconnecting with my family was priceless

The main reason my father, brother, and I were in Serbia was to visit extended family. My dad was born in an area just outside the capital city of Belgrade. He and my grandparents immigrated to the United States when he was quite young, and besides a few visits at age 10, he hadn’t returned in decades.

We explored Belgrade by foot, taxi, bus, and train. We celebrated Easter with my great-aunt, drank beers on the coast of the Danube, took shots of rakia in a lively kafana, and ate our weight in smoked meats. And even though half of us didn’t speak the same language, we made memories to last a lifetime.

Exploring new places provided a fresh perspective

After our week in Serbia, my dad, brother, and I said goodbye to my uncle, rented a car and began our next adventure: driving to the small Bosnian village where my grandparents were born. On our way, we stopped in Sarajevo to explore the rich blend of cultures in the “Jerusalem of Europe.” It was incredible to hear the imams calling everyone to prayer as we wandered the Old City.

Later as we continued through the countryside, I found myself lost in thought picturing alternate lifetimes. From the busy city to beautiful lakes to the near-deserted village of Cerni Lug, immersing myself in new spaces was the perfect opportunity to recenter and reflect on the values and practices I wanted the next chapter of my life to include.

Plans are nice, but spontaneity can heal all

I’ve had the privilege of traveling abroad before. My ideal travel style involves knowing where I’m going, how long I’ll be there, and where I’ll lay my head. My brother is the polar opposite, needing no plans at all. While these differences caused the typical sibling bickering, embracing the unknown was part of this trip’s appeal. With our backpacks and our rental car, the three of us drove through the Croatian mountainside, stopping for gas, scenic views, and the occasional fresh roadside fruit.

At the start of the trip, I thought we’d end there — I would fly to London, spend my layover with my situationship, and then head home to Chicago. But as the days ticked by, I grew more adventurous and wanted nothing to do with the British Isles. I rearranged the entire return trip, booking a €50 (about $52 USD) Ryanair flight and securing last minute tickets to the Emilia Romagna Formula 1 Grand Prix. Sharing this unexpected experience with my dad was the perfect ending that I never expected.

Traveling with family can be a blessing and a curse. Typical stresses and family dynamics tend to compound, but you’re left with a once-in-a-lifetime experience to explore the world with those you love most. Do I want to get dumped on my birthday again? No. But would I plan another European road trip? Absolutely.