We asked 7 married men when they knew their spouse was The One. Some were all in before the first date.

Dominique Bouchard, 33, caught the eye of Kolter Bouchard, also 33, on their first day of college.

Kolter’s profession: Co-founder and chief executive of Symal Creative Inc. and content creator

Dominique’s profession: Co-founder and head of marketing of Symal Creative Inc. and content creator

When they met: 2009

When they got married: 2014

How they met: Kolter and Dominique met in a creative writing class during their first week of college. Kolter said he noticed Dominique immediately.

“I spotted her in class, and I was like, ‘My God, I need me a lot of that,'” he said. “Every week, I would try to sit closer to her.”

Kolter eventually asked Dominique on a study date in his dorm via Facebook Messenger, during which they shared their first kiss.

“Fifteen years later, we have a four-and-a-half-year-old daughter,” he said.

When he knew: “I don’t necessarily know if I had designs on a long-term relationship,” Kolter said. “I was captivated by her. I’m still captivated by her, and my thought wasn’t six months from now. It was six minutes from now. It was six hours from now.”

“It was certainly lust at first sight, and I think it was probably love at fourth or fifth sight,” he added.

Kolter also said when he realized he wanted to constantly work at being better for Dominique, he knew their connection was something special.

What he loves about his relationship: Kolter said that he is grateful for the way his relationship with Dominique has grown, particularly after they went through life changes like having their daughter, the pandemic, and Kolter being diagnosed with stage 2 Hodgkin lymphoma in the span of a few months. He is in remission now, but cancer changed his perspective on his relationship.

“I think that we are uniquely aware of the gratitude we have for each other and the gratitude that we have for ourselves as a unit,” Kolter said.

“My wife is making my life better, and I know that I’m making my wife’s life better,” he added. “It’s an incredible amount of work, but it’s work we choose to do.”

His advice for people who haven’t found the one yet: Kolter said it’s important to find someone you’re willing to learn to love well through life’s changes.

“My wife and I are not the people we were at 18, and if we still were, that would be frightening,” Kolter explained. “We’ve been fortunate as we’ve grown to grow with each other and to promote growth within each other.”

He added that prioritizing individual development even in a relationship is important, too, as no one can be everything for their partner.