A recent sleepover made me consider how different my childhood was compared to my children’s. Sleepovers were a common experience for me growing up; most Fridays were spent sleeping over at one person’s house, and the next night, they would come over and sleep at mine.
Due to distance and scheduling, my kids only get to do sleepovers a couple of times a year, and I worry they’re missing out on an important event in their lives.
While my sleepovers were better than theirs, their experiences in other areas of their childhood seem much better. And while I’m happy they get to have those experiences, I’m also starting to get a little jealous.
My kids will never understand the horror of lawn duty
When I was 11, my mother put me in charge of lawn maintenance. The tasks included mowing and weeding the yard once a week — twice during the summer — regardless of how much the lawn actually needed trimming. Whole Saturday mornings were sacrificed in the name of lawn purity. My mother occasionally emerged from the house like Miss. Trunchbull to measure the height of the weeds while I sat cowering in the shade.
Decades later, my oldest son was put in charge of mowing the lawn. If his experience had been anything like mine, this should have been a time of brief excitement followed by the drudgery of a new chore. So, does the prospect of having to clip grass make my son anxious?
On the contrary, he steps out from the garage sporting a straw gardening hat, plucks a tall blade of grass, sticks it between his teeth, and proceeds to trim every green spot with a smile on his face. No anxiety over getting the grass cut just right, no worries about the inability to differentiate between a weed and a plant that just looks like a weed.
He’s just making the most out of a simple chore.
His lack of anxiety makes me jealous — if not outright spiteful. If the housing market weren’t so insane, I’d be tempted to buy a house with a bigger lawn just so he’d have to mow it. (Twice a week during the summer, too.)
My children get to explore the country
Most of the family vacations I had growing up involved traveling to the same places, mostly because of budget restrictions. Spring breaks were spent with relatives in West Virginia, summer vacations were a long weekend at a beachside hotel, and October was for camping at Disney and sneaking into the pools at the more expensive hotels.
By contrast, my kids have been everywhere. In addition to the annual summer visits to relatives, they’ve stayed at Orlando resorts, Chattanooga log cabins, Asheville house rentals, North Carolina condominiums, and Breckenridge ski lodges.
Granted, I was with them when they went to those places, but they certainly do enjoy a more travel-friendly childhood than I had. They’re all the more lucky for it.
They have more screen time
Video games were my hobby from grade school, and there’s no way to calculate the amount of money I spent on them — as well as on magazines and merchandise.
Most of today’s popular games don’t really interest me, but I do still enjoy an open-world action-adventure — when I can find the time to play. It took me two months to beat the original “Legend of Zelda;” it took more than two years to complete “Breath of the Wild,” and it was worth it.
So why am I jealous of the gaming experiences enjoyed by my boys? Because while it takes me years to get through one massive game, they can complete the entire game in a long weekend. They simply have the time to do whatever they want, which includes beating a video game.
They don’t have to spend hours at church like I did
Of all the shared life experiences, church activity makes me the most envious.
Church played a big role in my youth. In addition to Sunday services, I practically lived on the Methodist church campus, singing in the choir, volunteering for special events, participating in the youth ministries, and doing service projects.
While I easily spent three hours every Sunday at church, my kids currently only hang around for an hour, get a doughnut, then go home and put their comfy clothes back on. They have yet to learn the torture of being forced to wear nice clothes for three hours and not being allowed to get dirty. And it’s just not fair.
I’m learning to work through my jealousy
For all my growling about lawn chores, travel options, screen time, and church services, I love how my children actively benefit from all the opportunities they have. They have more enrichment opportunities than I had at their age, which means they’ll hopefully be able to provide even more opportunities for their kids.
That’s a great antidote against any feelings of jealousy.
And it’s nice to think that someday in the future, my oldest will be hesitant to let his kid mow the lawn, too.
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